William Berger

Every now and then someone comes along who is bound to change the course of history. And with this young man, you can definitively say: This is not one of them.

Will was born in Weston, Connecticut - a town one of his professors accurately described as “the most boring town in America,” - with the temperature at precisely 297.039 Kelvin. (Isn’t Google amazing.)

Most people don’t know this, but Will actually is a 65-year-old man in a 19-year-old’s body. You can tell because of how often he says “Ow. My back.” or “Newfangled technology.” He also reminisces about the golden age of Broadway and how music was better in the seventies, despite the fact that he was in fact not around to see it.

Will is best known for being the most sought after TA in all of Hogwarts and draft dodging the hunger games.